The book “The Four Loves” is divided into Storge Philia Eros Agaphe. Eros, the chapter that we read, is about “the kind of love which lovers are.” Eros is more of the romantic side of a relationship and Venus is more of the carnal side of the relationship. In a relationship Eros should come before Venus because of Eros being more of the romantic and closer side in a relationship. Eros carries the aspect of a man loving a woman for who she is rather than Venus for the physical attraction.
Eros makes it so that a man wants a woman for the person that she is and not for the sexual drive which is presented so many times in this life. This is referred to as a Venus type of love which is more of a self centered type of love usually focused more on the outside appearance of things. Lewis writes that “Eros wants the beloved” meaning that Eros is focused on the feelings. Along with Eros will eventually come the drive of Venus. It is a “by product” of Eros that will follow the romantic side.
In this life it is very easy to be caught up in the Venus type of love and forget about the Eros side. The world pictures love in this way and it can creep into our lives. It is a desire that must only exist in the marriage bond.
In Ephesians 5:25 it states “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” This verse is telling us to use a Christ like reverence in our love that we have for one another, whether it is towards our family, wives, or friends in the church. We must always strive to live towards Christ and His church.